, , , , , , , , , ,

Many of us come to the hard realization that we have not…
Whatever follows the ellipsis is for you, the reader, to insert
Some examples that come to mind are we have not:
Done enough
Tried hard enough
Listened or learned enough
Cared enough
All of these suggestions may connect with many of you whose gaze may have found this screen
As I began writing this collection of words,
I thought that I was about to write some type of thought provoking poem
Something that I could share with you and create a new level of connection
Yet, I find that this collection of thoughts has an agenda of its own
And as a result, I will yield to it as it sees fit
Why does this realization have to occur at this exact moment?
I really do not know
Does it matter to me?
Of course it does, why else would I continue to stroke my keyboard.
Much of what I have written within this blog and throughout this short time as a writer/researcher has been in search of something
That something has been a host of different things and answers
Sometimes I have been searching or seeking questions
In any case, I find that the more that I traveled along this journey the more beautiful
It has become
But I could not be without honesty, in my declaration,
that there often was more pain found in this journey than beauty
This hard realization that I speak of,
I’m sure that many of you can declare your very own journey within your narrative
We are all passengers, and if we are lucky, drivers in our travels
We take detours
We get lost
Only to be found or find that most important thing(s) or person(s)
I know that within this beautifully painful journey that I’m currently on
I have been more than fortunate to find special people who no matter how distant they are now
Reside within my heart and mind in the most profound ways
We continue to seek and search out those valuable moments in the midst of our pain
We continue to fool ourselves into getting up when we’ve been knocked down
By whatever life has placed before us or even behind us
Did we try hard enough?
I wonder that so many times about various interactions that I’ve had over my lifetime
That conclusion has yet to be answered, but of course
In that lies the beauty of the pain
Some have said that to feel pain is to truly live
For how do we know what truly matters to us if we never know how much losing it truly impacts us?
Friendships, loves, family, and ourselves
All of the above have at various times been both lost and found along this journey
What does one listen and learn from when the lessons are for others?
What does one do when all that they do is not enough?
Caring is a word that is a foreign language that one must speak
With hopes that the interpreter finds the right message
Seeking and searching is what we do each and every day
Seeking and searching is our means for moving forward
Moving beyond our current realities
Seeking and searching
For the answers to our internal questions and quests
Seeking and searching for our inner and external peace
We can always stop, but if we do
what have we allowed to slip through our grasps?
Seeking and searching is
Is just that…