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Patrick S. De Walt, M.B.A., Ph.D.

~ Communal Conversations for the Promotion of Active Critical Engagement

Patrick S. De Walt, M.B.A., Ph.D.

Tag Archives: Streams of consciousness

Sirens Blazing

24 Sunday May 2015

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry, Racialization Impacts

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Art, blacklivesmatter, Blackness, blackwomenlivesmatter, citizens' rights, Culture, expression, Freewrite, humanity, Identity, in memoriam, injustice, law, oppression, Performance, poetry, police state, policing, power, Race, sayhername, social critique, social justice, Streams of consciousness, underrepresented groups

Sirens blazing
Shots fired
Lives lost
Tears flowing

Sirens blazing
Shots fired
Lives lost
Tears flowing

A vicious cycle plaguing a nation full of rage
Rage that was neither emancipated in the age of Lincoln
Nor transcended with the election of Obama
In the spirit of bell hooks,
Black Looks and Killing Rage
Are still points of contingency for The Souls of Black Folk

Where are our Ida B. Wells or Sojourner Truths as the noose is replaced by the shield?
As the white sheets that supposedly aided The Birth of a Nation appear to be replaced by the “women and men in blue”
Is this a visceral reaction to a troubling time in this nation’s history?
For some, the answer will ultimately be “yes” but for others it will be more of the status quo.

A status quo response to the historic oppression and denigration of a collection of people who seem to have never received the promise of humanity
A collection of people whose bodies are riddled with emotional, physical, psychological, and visual assaults

Perceptions that continue for Africana women in the manner in which their bodies are assailed in a land of Patriarchy
Perceptions that continue as men of African descent no matter how well groomed or dressed still receive the “clench your purse” and/or “lock your door” treatment

Sirens blazing
Shots fired
Lives lost
Tears flowing

Sirens blazing
Shots fired
Lives lost
Tears flowing

Bloody streets along dilapidated buildings
Underfunded communities make for easy targets
Not solely for the spectacle of media coverage but for the many corporate and venture capitalists who will undoubtedly swoop in for bargain prices to fulfill their duties of gentrification

Bye-bye Fourth Ward AKA Freedmen’s Town in Houston, TX
Bye-bye to as many indicators of the past that cannot be revised by our Educational Agencies and elected/appointed officials who wish to promote a particular narrative

Sirens blazing
Shots fired
Lives lost
Tears flowing

Sirens blazing
Shots fired
Lives lost
Tears flowing

Are chickens coming home to roost?
El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz once raised such a point
And we are still waiting for an explicit answer

Sirens
Shots
Lives
Tears…

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Relegated Revelations

25 Saturday Apr 2015

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Art, expression, Freewrite, Identity, Performance, poetry, self exploration, Streams of consciousness

We start our journeys
One thought
One step
One instilled value
At a time
We are shaped by our environment(s)
Both the visible and invisible elements
Within each aspect we find more of ourselves
Or at least the self that we have been taught to see
Relegated revelations
The byproducts of embracing life’s journey
Questioning each step and phase as it happens
Recognizing the harsh reality that much of what we have come to embrace as truth is less accurate than what we may have originally perceived
as we experience our very own
Relegated revelations

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Stagnated Endeavor

11 Saturday Apr 2015

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Uncategorized

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Tags

Art, expression, Freewrite, poetry, Streams of consciousness

The fluid motion that guides us is one that must never be forsaken
Life’s challenges and uncertainties give many, reasons to fail through surrender
Only to blame those missteps on the acts of others
And not their very own
Only to cloak oneself in the fabric of self-proclaimed ignorance
While remaining crafty in every personal interaction
Manipulation is a characteristic worthy of a Chess reference
No Rook
No Pawn
No Bishop
No Queen
Can protect the path and direction of the susceptible King
A king with a troubled crown
Situated above an even more troubled brow
Limiting the gaze into possibility
How does one continue to create a foundation without the proper components at their disposal?
How does one continue to manufacture an existence that its creator shuns?
What other outcome can be had when only one outcome is desired?
Trepidation is the battle cry for many who are stagnate
Stagnate emotionally
Stagnate physically
Stagnate in every facet of the human endeavor
An endeavor that we have come to know as living…

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Seeking Satisfaction

26 Thursday Mar 2015

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, expression, Freewrite, Identity, Performance, poetry, social critique, Streams of consciousness

The choices that make our lives unique
Come at a premium that often we, at the outset, are unwilling to pay
We find external excuses or justifications to satisfy our ineptness
Our insecurities
Our inability to accept our faults
Seeking satisfaction comes at a cost
Temporary pleasure often is at the expense of a lifetime of trust
Fleeting accomplishments are what we are more accustom to these days
We are creatures of substance who have for some unfortunate reason
lost our way
We, in our moments of dismay, seek what is often the worst thing for us
on our respective journeys
We find satisfaction in vices of pleasure or materialism
Forgetting the substances that feed our souls or inner selves
We become idle beings who are waiting for Superman
A figment of our creation and not that of Siegel and Shuster
We conform to others’ whims and wishes
Hoping to make them our own
Hoping that we can fool ourselves into a false sense of self actualization
Seeking satisfaction
While enduring a world of agony
Problematizes all that we hold dear
Hold as truth
Hold us together
We are ultimately fragmentized
Rendered emotionally impotent
A survivor of our own personal holocaust
Such a painful word that evokes such memories is intentional
For we, who have been emotionally scared, continue to wear our identifiers
Our emotional tattoos or, in some cases, a modern day scarlet letter
An imaginary yet ever so real reminder of the person
we wish we were not being
who resides in our mirrors
Seeking satisfaction is our battle cry
For a silent yet painstaking internal war
As if Dan Brown was the author
The irony of Angels and Demons
on this day
Robert Langdon has no answers that quench our insatiable thirsts
Seeking satisfaction
Is like we are Perceval chasing a Holy Grail
without any clues…

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Through Loss We Find Strength

20 Friday Mar 2015

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, expression, Family, Freewrite, in memoriam, Legacy, loss, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness, tribute

As the years and memories fade and are reimagined
The loss of loved ones endure within us sentiments
Sentiments that recapture what those we’ve loved
have meant and continue to mean each and every day
Losing those whom you love is an inevitable part of living
A part of living that reminds us of how limited our physical time will be on this earth
Reminds us what we too easily forget
the importance not only of loving but being loved
Reminds us that the love we can offer is unique
And truly meaningful
A meaning that we often are painfully reminded of in memoriam
Through loss
We find strength
A strength to cry as we reflect
A strength to mourn as our hearts require
A strength to move one step forward through each tear and moment of sadness
Through loss
We find strength
A strength to share our memories for future generations to know
A strength to help fill a void that loss often creates
Not equally as our predecessor
but only as we can through what we carry with us of them
Through loss
We find strength
A strength that is forged through long nights and pillow soaked mornings
A strength forged through battles with depression and grief
A strength forged through allowing others to see our vulnerabilities
Through loss
We find strength
To continue
To remember
To share
To love
In order that we can continue to live
So that our love for them can too…

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Crossed Among A Heart, Head, and Hard Place

11 Wednesday Mar 2015

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, expression, Motivation, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness, Teacher influence

The lives that we live can shape our thoughts and dreams
Deterring us from our destinies and obligations
Between a rock and a hard place
When taken at face value
places us in between only two possibilities
A duality that offers us little recourse
Between a rock and a hard place
Paints a portrait of helplessness and desperation
Yet, I ask how many of us have found ourselves there?
How many of us saw no conceivable way out?
How many us were ready to fail before we even considered our ability to succeed?
Between rock and a hard place is not the end all be all
It is only a place that we, if not diligent, will remain waiting for another to rescue us
Between a rock and a hard place
Is not a natural place for human beings to
Be
Exist
Thrive
Between a rock and a hard place
Limits our free movement which so many us needed as children and as adults still need
Between a rock in a hard place is
Where we may find our enemy
Of many forms
Between a rock and a hard place
Is not to be ignored as a figment of our imaginations
It is real and harming so many bright futures and minds
Breaking spirits
Creating a sense of languish
Eroding our abilities to rise to the occasion
Between a rock and a hard place
You will find people like me
Those who seek to enter the most challenging of places because we know that we must
Because some of us know that we were and remain only a few choices and/or chances of fate from being there as well
Because at some point in time,
We’ve realized that we are not between a rock and hard place
Instead
We are crossed among a heart, head, and hard place
Our hearts extend out to those who are in all sorts of circumstances
Our heads are constantly seeking remedies and solutions for those who
suffer,
have suffered,
or will suffer in the future
And as a result of each,
We are fixtures within this space
Between a rock and a hard place
Because we believe that by us being there
If only for a moment
We’ve created a softer space that was not there before…

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Life’s Transitions

29 Monday Dec 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

Art, Culture, expression, free write, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness

No matter who we are or what we ultimately do
We face certain unifying experiences
Those that transform us in immeasurable ways
We offer different names for what these experiences mean to us
With good reason
Yet, if we are lucky
We are able to muster enough within ourselves to embrace
these moments as frequently as they happen within our lives
Life’s transitions are often extremely difficult to understand
Let alone endure
Yet, we must do so
These transitions may require letting go
Or holding on tighter
That’s the most interesting thing about it
We don’t always know what we should do when we are faced with these instances
Or dreams
That are hopefully what drive us
They provide us with the gifts that preoccupy our existences
If we are truly lucky
We even recognize when these monumental moments arise
If we are less fortunate
we learn of them after our opportunity has expired
As if it were set on the side of a milk carton
Life’s transitions are vital to our growth and development
Life’s transitions are concretely etched in the timeline that defines our imprint on Mother Earth
What a wonderful life we can have if we embrace the good and bad found within our life’s transitions
I, for one, am trying my best do this now in spite of every reason that I can devise not to
Life’s transitions are living, breathing, feeling oxymorons
They are my Rubik’s Cube that I have yet to solve…

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Trails of Frustration

18 Thursday Dec 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, Culture, expression, free write, Identity, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness

The more I have tried the harder it has seemed
To get closer to you while being me
Authenticity appears to be a staple frame of reference yet not a stapled reality
Managing perspectives to deliver catered messages is not the communiqué in which I wish to be the conveyor
Nor
Author
Trust and vulnerability are not easy to come by
Or manifest for the sake of another
Yet I continue to occupy these like Wall Street
or
Ferguson
I’m the protester
Authenticity is so much more yet so hard to achieve and/or recognize
In a world of emotional landmines that two hearts have endure constant bombardment
Yet, I still stand
as
Maya still rose
Frustration is a real emotion that seems to follow me each and every step of my journey
Whether it is from not being understood or viewed as some exotic threat
Frustration is found within a desired belief that what I deserve is out there
And waiting
And wanting the same from me
A connection
A commitment
Trust
Honesty
Frustration is in the extrapolation of complexity for the desire of simplicity
Frustration is in the unachieved yet anticipated
Frustration is found within
As I seek to gain a meaningful connection with you…

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Dark & Stormy

21 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, Culture, expression, free write, Identity, Performance, poetry, social critique, Streams of consciousness

Dwelling within an eternal space that amasses such memories
Memories that solicit inner emotions that require
1 to harness
much from within
1 to grapple with those things that are often held true
It is essential for what we hold inside
that we yield
our willingness to acquiesce to others’ understandings and accepted values
That we challenge our own conventions
An internal status quo
We are mere subjects in others’ scripts of our realities
How does that even happen?
How did we become pawns in our own game of checkers?
As insane as that may sound
we tend to allow our realities to be
improperly depicted by others
at ever turn or opportunity
As linear as we wish our lives to be
We are not that simplistic
We are as complex as we allow ourselves to discover
Yet, most of us are hindered
Hindered by our fears of what we may discover
Or what others have reconfigured our figured worlds to be
How did we enter into this darkness
the storm that presents itself?
For us to embark upon
Where is our beacon?
Where is our North Star?
Where is our means to an end?
Amid the darkness
we are challenged to find our light
Not from the presence of others
but from that which we find within
The storm is not over as many evangelically love to espouse
It has only just begun
For we are called to put ourselves on trail
Unlike the likes of Ferguson…

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Ironic Captivation

12 Wednesday Nov 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, expression, Freewrite, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness

Moments like these remind me of what life has to offer
A complex set of possibilities that are fashioned by our desires and conjectures
We form so much of our realities through envisioning something so much more than others may see for themselves
We believe as if our lives depended on it
We cherish the littlest sentiment that is conveyed when it appears that nothing else really matters
Yet, there are so many things that are of equal importance but we are too enamored by its beauty that we cannot focus on anything beyond its silhouette
For her it may be found in his chiseled frame that exudes a protective strength
For him, it may be found in her delicate nature that he seeks to possess and protect as if he were Solomon
At this point, I am unclear if either is an accurate depiction of what often is the false fantasy that romance and love are flaunted to be
What are the purposes of roses for one who is rendered emotionally senseless?
What is the purpose of saying sweet nothings when your vocal chords are muted by forces beyond your control?
What is the purpose of highlighting the bluest of skies to one who only responds to a bombardment of raindrops?
Jaded narratives have no place in a reality that reminds us that love is a fleeting phenomenon that challenges us to be all that we hope to be and then some
Building monuments of sentiment that with a few well-placed words can be decimated beyond recognition.
Echoes of a distant voice that spoke a rhythm into a willing heart
To beat a new tune that unknowingly was nothing more than transient
Leaving in its wake a shell that remains empty and traumatized
If it were a bird it would be grounded unable to soar
Leaving it at the mercy of its hostile environment
If it were a fawn it would be underdeveloped and reduced to being easy prey for local predators.
If it were human it would be heartbroken left to ponder the disjointed puzzle that reality has placed at ones feet.
Affairs of the heart leave us bewildered when they escape our grasp forcing us to reevaluate our grip.
Questioning our form
Our intentions
Our desire to hold it in the first place
Affairs of the heart are just that
Occurrences that shape our moods
Our patience
Our relevance to others
No longer does it make sense to chase a distant star that does not seek claiming
It has professed a need to roam the constellations it has become accustomed
The fragility of all that is bound to this complex set of sentimentalities is of significant concern
Not solely for the one who is enraptured in its deliberate spell but only for the benefit of what has cast it
No need to deny what all who are around already know
You have been blindsided by Cupid’s arrow or it is the luck not granted from failing to find that pot of gold.
In all cases, we are merely captivated by the irony that what we crave may be as imaginary as the fairytales that we’ve come to know as modern day sensibilities.
Ironic Captivation is here for us all to contend with yet we are less prepared for this onslaught of mountainous critique
Ironic Captivation is learning that what makes sense in ones head does not always translate into what is enacted in ones heart.
Making sense is for another game
that those who travel this path most certainly are at its mercy
Ironic Captivation is an element in our every day experiences
We can configure our realities through the responses of those who are within our midst
We are perpetually enacting the roles that others have defined for us
How ironic?

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Seeking and Searching

07 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, eclectic, expression, free form, free write, Identity, impromptu, organic thoughts, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness

Many of us come to the hard realization that we have not…
Whatever follows the ellipsis is for you, the reader, to insert
Some examples that come to mind are we have not:
Done enough
Tried hard enough
Listened or learned enough
Cared enough
All of these suggestions may connect with many of you whose gaze may have found this screen
As I began writing this collection of words,
I thought that I was about to write some type of thought provoking poem
Something that I could share with you and create a new level of connection
Yet, I find that this collection of thoughts has an agenda of its own
And as a result, I will yield to it as it sees fit
Why does this realization have to occur at this exact moment?
I really do not know
Does it matter to me?
Of course it does, why else would I continue to stroke my keyboard.
Much of what I have written within this blog and throughout this short time as a writer/researcher has been in search of something
That something has been a host of different things and answers
Sometimes I have been searching or seeking questions
In any case, I find that the more that I traveled along this journey the more beautiful
It has become
But I could not be without honesty, in my declaration,
that there often was more pain found in this journey than beauty
This hard realization that I speak of,
I’m sure that many of you can declare your very own journey within your narrative
We are all passengers, and if we are lucky, drivers in our travels
We take detours
We get lost
Only to be found or find that most important thing(s) or person(s)
I know that within this beautifully painful journey that I’m currently on
I have been more than fortunate to find special people who no matter how distant they are now
Reside within my heart and mind in the most profound ways
We continue to seek and search out those valuable moments in the midst of our pain
We continue to fool ourselves into getting up when we’ve been knocked down
By whatever life has placed before us or even behind us
Did we try hard enough?
I wonder that so many times about various interactions that I’ve had over my lifetime
That conclusion has yet to be answered, but of course
In that lies the beauty of the pain
Some have said that to feel pain is to truly live
For how do we know what truly matters to us if we never know how much losing it truly impacts us?
Friendships, loves, family, and ourselves
All of the above have at various times been both lost and found along this journey
What does one listen and learn from when the lessons are for others?
What does one do when all that they do is not enough?
Caring is a word that is a foreign language that one must speak
With hopes that the interpreter finds the right message
Seeking and searching is what we do each and every day
Seeking and searching is our means for moving forward
Moving beyond our current realities
Seeking and searching
For the answers to our internal questions and quests
Seeking and searching for our inner and external peace
We can always stop, but if we do
what have we allowed to slip through our grasps?
Seeking and searching is
Is just that…

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Watching Life In Front of Me

05 Wednesday Nov 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

≈ Leave a comment

Tags

Art, Culture, expression, free write, impromptu, onsite content, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness

Hearing the confident laughter
From a new yet familiar voice
A tone that represents a new beginning
Or a new ending
That chapter has not yet revealed itself
Watching life in front of me
Requires that risks are taken
Chances are had
Minds are open
Watching life in front of me
Is a special occurrence that does not always happen
Yet, today it does and has
The glow that is found within the frame of a personalized figure
Looms large around me
Yet, does just enough to keep its distance
The intrigue continues to perplex
And entice one to further explore the journey
A journey that unfolds with each breath taken
Each thought fragilely formed within
Connecting the dots to a coffee stained canvas
Watching life in front of me
Allows for the life behind me to remain there….

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On a Projected Canvas

04 Tuesday Nov 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, Culture, expression, Identity, Performance, poetry, social critique, Streams of consciousness

Innocence lost at the behest of vivid imaginations
Targeted in ways that are both subtle and direct
Questioned with the intent of proving guilt
Without representation
Without reprieve
Without reason
On a projected canvas
The lives of so many are written
Often without their consent or knowledge
Assumptions
More definitive than required with very little truly known
Assumptions are the nature of humanity
For both good and bad outcomes
Sometimes there is just gray
This is where this canvas is often situated
Yet, is not often allowed to exist within this space
As this space is reserved for others
Who might those others be?
That question is worth a million dollars
And cannot be answered within the crafting of this message
On a projected canvas
Fantasies are constructed
Insecurities are displaced
Doubts are affirmed
On this projected canvas
There is no refuge for this wayward soul
A soul that feels as if it has been projected as a Katrina refugee
As ill placed as that label was
Yet, for some, that title still holds true
Just not in the open
On a projected canvas
The image is a living contradiction
One that means so much to many yet
So little to others
The irony of this phenomenon is one that harbors on the ridiculous
If it were not experienced in the flesh
A flesh that is thought to be weak
A heart thought to be deformed or incapable of a committed melody
There is no conductor who can lead this misguided cast of characters
Let this story be told
Another project for those who love to project
Their own flaws
Their own doubts
Their own insecurities
This is not a misnomer nor a call to action
For the acts in question have already taken place
The canvas already has been painted
Yet, the subject was nowhere to be found during its invention
On a projected canvas
More is told about the crafter than what was allegedly crafted…

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Echoes of You

04 Tuesday Nov 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, Culture, expression, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness

Distant scents that remind me
Faint whispers accented with that special flair
Vast arrays of symbols and actions
Echoes of You
The speech given that connects us
Unites a diverse collection of souls
Echoes of You
Revisiting the past
Shaping of a future
A future with noticeable holes
Similar to stenciled characters
On an uneven canvas
Gifted to tell an untellable story
One that seems to position itself
Just beyond normal reach
So we must endure
We strive
We must not give in
Nor give up
Echoes of You
Reminiscent of something with so much promise
Yet, so much confusion
Uncertainty and doubt
Echoes of You
Damaged much in its wake
Hearts, spirits, and dreams
Yet, a conviction serves as a reminder of the test
A test of these troubling times
Echoes of You
Becoming fainter with each breath of life taken
With each step forged forward
With each dream re-envisioned

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To What End…

22 Wednesday Oct 2014

Posted by Patrick S. De Walt, MBA, PhD in Poetry

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Tags

Art, Culture, expression, Identity, Performance, poetry, Streams of consciousness

What in spires us finds its mark
In the most inopportune ways
We are taken in by its aura
We are captivated by its essence
We are entranced by strands of consciousness
That emote something from within
Within ourselves
Within our hearts
We shutter to think of that the outcomes represent
Yet we challenge ourselves to move forward
To embark
On our journey
Which life requires of us
For the alternative is what Sartre
Describes as Being and Nothingness
A duality that overshadows me
Always placed as the adversary
To what is viewed as ordinary
Normal
I by sheer definition then must be abnormal
For my reality and my thoughts seem to be steps out of place
Within my ever changing circles
In adapting loss of ones personhood is the only conceivable outcome
So along the margins I choose to remain
Marginalized or margin-less
The boundaries that are set for us are often the ones that we most set for ourselves through our fears and trepidations
Can we channel our spirits for something more
Even if it requires our all?
Can we see beyond our limits even if it impairs our present?
We are what we answer to.
Or better yet what we allow others to ascribe to us
We cannot be victims in our own existence
We have believe and perceive ourselves to be our very own champions
For without that belief within ourselves
What is at our core is fated to no longer exist
So live for life’s sake
Breathe fully
And love intensely
But make sure that all that are done are granted for yourself first
And not another…

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dewalt@patricksdewaltmbaphd.com

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Copyright Patrick S. De Walt, M.B.A., Ph.D. (c) 2013

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Mandisa R. Haarhoff

theotherclass

Creating Equity within the Hidden Curriculum

From The Desk of Dr. Seria

Real Advice for Real People

Resurgence: The Multidisciplinary Research Project (MRP)

Fusing elements of the past with the pressing needs of today through the convergence of multiple disciplines

MSNBC Top Stories

Communal Conversations for the Promotion of Active Critical Engagement

Education Week: American Education's News Site of Record

Communal Conversations for the Promotion of Active Critical Engagement

psicologiaeafricanidades.wordpress.com/

Centro de Pesquisa e Formação

African American Policy Forum

Communal Conversations for the Promotion of Active Critical Engagement

School Finance 101

Data and thoughts on public and private school funding in the U.S.

Cloaking Inequity

A blog focused on education and social justice research

Michael Dixon's Adventures

Communal Conversations for the Promotion of Active Critical Engagement

DISSENTING JUSTICE

Communal Conversations for the Promotion of Active Critical Engagement

NewBlackMan (in Exile)

Communal Conversations for the Promotion of Active Critical Engagement

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